Louisiana Cooking: Delicious or Deadly?

I have mentioned before several times, I am from Minnesota. Hell, it’s the entire basis for this blog. How I get really confused and end up in horribly awkward situations because I’m so horribly Minnesotan. To me, a delicious home cooked meal is lefse and potato dumplings smothered in butter and salt. Everything is pretty white in color, bland in taste, and absolutely fucking amazing.

However, Louisiana is known internationally for its flavorful cooking. And I will admit, when I can get over the horrible searing of my mouth, it’ll probably be amazing.

Of course, I have to be an idiot and try out my own Cajun cooking.

There’s this seasoning that is the base of all Louisiana cooking. It’s called Tony Chachere’s Everything Seasoning.

This shit is dangerous

This shit is dangerous

 

When you go to a restaurant in Louisiana and ask for salt, they’ll hand you a can of this. It’s an extremely spicy seasoning blend that is pretty freaking amazing. I have two separate cans of it, which goes against everything my cooking stands for. However, my first can of it has lasted me three years and I’m not even half way through it. A typical Cajun family will go through one can a week. I can use a very light sprinkle, while everyone else drowns their food in it.

My work had pot luck recently, and I was very excited for it considering everyone was making really southern food. They made greens, jambalaya, dirty rice, and the works. I also had no idea that “greens” in Louisiana is collard greens boiled in bacon fat, making it about ¾ bacon and ¼ actual greens. Naturally, drowned in creole seasoning.

The food was amazing.

And my mouth was dying.

I was chugging water and soda trying to get rid of the burning sensation in my mouth. My eyes were watering and I was trying anything to get rid of the burn. My manager then informed me that they hardly used any seasoning in their food and that it was bland.

I was so confused. My brain couldn’t comprehend this. It was so blasted with flavor I felt like my mouth was dying.

So today I decided to make Beef and Beer chili. I decided to put a Cajun spin on it and add this seasoning, but I grabbed my can of “More Spice” creole seasoning, which means it’s about half cayenne pepper.

And I pour it in. Like a Cajun would.

Probably about 4 tablespoons of this stuff.

And my house smells amazing from this. It smells spicy, but I’m thinking “It’s a big pot of chili, I’ll be fine.”

So I taste it.

And I immediately spit it out.

It’s been two hours and my mouth is still burning. It’s so spicy. I’m dying.

So I texted my manager who is really cool about me texting him my horrible culinary experiences because he usually ends up laughing at how northern I am.

He’s laughing his ass off. While I’m dying.

Thank you Tony Chachere’s, for killing my mouth. And for making Louisiana think I’m a wimp.