Craigslist is Bipolar

So after feeling totally shot down with the whole “NO FAT CHICKS!” section of Craigslist, I decided to try to boost my ego and check it again.

Keep in mind, when I checked Craigslist the first time, it was around 90 degrees at night and way hotter during the day.  Recently, it’s actually been chilly with frost on the grass every morning and never getting above 65 during the day.  I thought maybe because heavy women have plenty of insulation, the men would notice this too and think, “Hey!  Fat chicks will keep me warm!”

So, feeling very determined, I decide to scope out Craigslist casual encounters to see what they like.

I was right.

I was so right.

When it’s cold, men like heavy women to keep them warm.  And other fun stuff.

 

Verdict on Louisiana men: Their tastes change with the season, just like women.  Women like skimpy in the summer, fluffy in the winter.  Just like men.

SCORE!

NO FAT CHICKS! (On Craigslist anyway…)

One evening, Alex and I were having a very normal strange discussion.

Alex: How do I know you’re not working and actually finding men to meet? (He says this very sarcastically, as if I’d talk to new people)

Me: Because men don’t like fat chicks here.  It’s not Alaska where fat chicks are the only chicks. *

Alex:  The obesity rate is higher here.

Me: But there are actually women here.  There weren’t women in Alaska.

Alex: This is true, but I bet if you went on Craigslist casual encounters, it would be all “Seeking BBW’s” and you’d have them lining up.

Me: CHALLENGE MOTHER FUCKING ACCEPTED!

 

So, as any normal person would do, I decide to check out the casual encounters page, thinking “Oh he has to be so wrong.”

Where dreams are turned into horror stories

Where dreams are turned into horror stories

 

Dude… I hate when he’s wrong about stuff like this.

I was actually kind of pissed.  After going through over 40 ads and several inappropriate pictures, All but a few of them were “NO FAT CHICKS!”

Excuse me, I’m not fat, I’m just swollen from this GOD FORSAKEN HEAT!

Now if you don’t mind, I’m going to go and gorge myself on cheesecake.

 

*Note: There are actually several insanely hot girls in Alaska.  Most of which are married or taken, all of which have a gun that they shoot very well.  I’ve never met an Alaskan girl who didn’t have a gun, seriously. And the Men to women ratio in Alaska was around 6:1, it was awesome.