Valentines Day Pity Party: A Beginner’s Guide

I have something to admit to everyone.

I really don’t like Valentines.

Now, for those of you who are close to me, you might find this surprising since Valentines day is technically my birthday.  But I’ve never really liked this particular holiday because it’s become so commercial and disappointing for those single girls who just eat chocolates and throw them at the TV because they’re so insanely depressed.

Seriously.

Seriously.

Luckily for me, I married a romantic gentleman.  Except when it comes to flowers, because screw flowers apparently.  Alex’s view on flowers is the same as my mother’s: Why buy them when they’re going to die right away?

How stupidly insane, right?  Flowers are gorgeous.

But before I met Alex, I always spent Valentine’s day by myself, eating ice cream and just feeling sorry for my single self.  I have had a lot of friends who are the in the same boat and also, a lot of people I know now that are in that boat.

So I decided that I’m going to spend Valentine’s day like a single person.  With my husband.  And our mutual friend.

So here are the keys to having an absolutely pathetic, yet awesome, valentines day if you’re alone.

1. Bailey’s Irish Cream

This is a must have.  The thing about Bailey’s is that it is the best possible liquor out there.  And get the flavored stuff too, they have a great hazelnut one, or chocolate, or whatever.  Pour that all over your ice cream. Or drink it straight.  No matter what, you’ll feel great.

Bailey's and Ice Cream.  A heavenly combination.

Bailey’s and Ice Cream. A heavenly combination.

Speaking of ice cream…

2.  Minimum 1 pint of ice cream

Being single on valentines just isn’t the same without ice cream.  It’s practically mandatory to have ice cream.  I’ve found that Blue Bell I ❤ Chocolate is absolutely excellent for valentines considering it’s just tons of chocolate with chocolate hearts IN THE ICE CREAM!

3. Sweat pants

Since you’re most likely not leaving the house or even showering since this is a pity party, might as well be comfortable.  I say you should be wearing sweatpants, or maybe order yourself some footsie pajamas.

DO IT!  YOU WILL NEVER REGRET IT EVER!

DO IT! YOU WILL NEVER REGRET IT EVER!

4. Stupid movies

Letters to Juliet, The Holiday, Romeo and Juliet, are sweet, romantic movies, but this will just make you feel worse.  I suggest something much more stupid like This Is The End, Movie 43, The Break Up, We’re The Millers, or if you want to feel really good about yourself, may I suggest The Hunger Games, Kimjonilia, Seoul Train, Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead?  These last few will make you realize that you just have shitty first world problems and that Valentines day is awful.

Alex offered to take me out this year for Valentines, but I’m really digging the idea of a jar of Nutella and a bottle of whiskey.

So we’ll probably watch stupid movies and order take out while eating tons of ice cream and laughing at how romantic other couples are because we are no longer romantic in any way.

 

What do you do on valentines?  Anything mushy or exciting?  Maybe something more?  Put your thoughts in the comments below!

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16 thoughts on “Valentines Day Pity Party: A Beginner’s Guide

  1. Oh my gosh I don’t even know if the scars of my past VDays have healed enough for me to talk about it. I loathe that holiday. Last year, I was dating an absolute DOUCHE BAG and I broke up with him on the day before Valentines (let’s be real though, I totally took his sorry ass back for a few more weeks before the most epic breakup of my life) but I spent Valentines Day going to an adult toy store with my friend and buying myself a replacement for the boyfriend. Yep, Happy Valentines Day.

  2. You might not be romantic, but I’m betting Alex is. Also your definition of romantic could be entirely different than the world’s. I don’t know about you but, for me, cuddling on the couch watching any movie at all, even a stupid one, counts as romantic in my book. Even if you’re not dressed in some slinky dress and he’s not wearing a tux. Just spending time with someone you care about can be romantic. Don’t let the world tell you what’s romantic and what’s not, Leah. You and Alex decide.

    • Awe thank you Cimmy 🙂

      I guess in that sense we are romantic. We always hold hands and we always snuggle on the couch to watch movies. Our comments of stuff kind of ruins it though. He’ll point out hot girls and I’ll point out men that make more money than him 😉

      But we always enjoy our holidays together. He’s really big into holidays and I’m pretty meh about all of them. He’s huge on birthdays and I usually just tell him to forget it’s my birthday. I’m just happy with a cup of coffee in bed versus the couch 🙂

  3. Alex’s view on flowers is the same as my mother’s: Why buy them when they’re going to die right away?

    How stupidly insane, right? Flowers are gorgeous.

    Stupidly insane? No. You know flowers are gorgeous, and I know flowers are gorgeous, but neither Alex nor your mother know why flowers appeal to you, and if I understand it right, you haven’t exactly stated it up front why.

    I’m trying to find John Gray’s explanation of why since I can’t remember it precisely, but Cimmorene did sum up a lot of it pretty well– she figures herself to be death on plants. She doesn’t want a potted plant that she’ll have to take care of and that’s likely to die on her watch anyways– she likes cut flowers and accepts that eventually, they will die off. She likes the thought and sentiment of them, which apparently Alex and your mother aren’t clued into.

    Mars and Venus, Leah, Mars and Venus. We swear by it, especially since a lot of men and women just don’t intuitively get gender differences right off the bat.

    • Haha, I love flowers because they’re pretty and smell nice. I would love if someone gave me a potted plant since I finally figured out how to keep them alive. I’ve always loved gardening.

      Alex and my mom are both overly practical people in the sense of presents and everyday expenditures. My mom will always get us stuff we need for christmas, and for the most part I’m the same way. But I love flowers. They’re so pretty, they brighten up a room, they make everything smell nice, and I just love them. My mom thinks the thought is very nice and all that, but she thinks it’s just a waste of money you could have spent on something like sheets or office supplies, or money towards a car payment. which I think is the single mom in her coming out.

      And I agree, Mars and Venus. Totally and completely.

      • It’s really helped that we now live in a house that has rose bushes in the front and backyard, at least during the warmer months that they’re in bloom. Since the rose bushes *must* be deadheaded during that time (and Cimmy does a great job of that), we have a 100% practical source of cut flowers.

        I’m okay with cut flowers during the cold months, though. I joke with Cimmy that she beat me to the punch when she got some recently, because I like giving them for “just because”. These recent ones were not roses (I appreciate the change of pace) and she put them in water and a vase right away. They are looking pretty good on the family room table right now (yes, I looked).

      • Bahaha, very jealous. This spring I’m planting a huge vegetable garden in the back yard since produce is so expensive. I do want to plant lavender in front of the house though. nothing is more pleasant than the assaulting smell of french lavender 🙂

      • Sounds like a really good idea. I’ve been looking into that as well, because homemade potpourri requires it as an ingredient (to hold essential oil).

        We are fortunate that produce is reasonable here, mostly by way of circular irrigation from the Snake, Columbia, and Yakima rivers. Still, I am trying to garden anyways, although Cimmy is less enthusiastic about working on it than I am.

      • Yeah since we’re military we get an allowance for food, and since food prices are pretty high in Louisiana, it makes it so we can’t afford fresh produce as much as we’d like. So growing a garden will allow us the luxury of having fresh produce grown by our own hands 🙂

  4. I’ve found with most men you just have to tell them exactly what you want. Making them try to figure out what to do that will not disappoint is just borderline mean. My husband and I have fought over his lack of romance but I’ve reached a point where I am just going to start telling him what I want to do for holidays and if there is anything I want we go get it. He does surprise me now and then with a gift he picked up or a bouquet when I’m not expecting it but I don’t look for things anymore. It just makes life easier. I’m happy with my love life and don’t need a huge expression of that anymore, the ring on our fingers and the fun we have together shows our love to each other all year.

    Of course there is the little girl inside me who wishes he was more romantic and puts on a big show of it for days like Valentines Day but in the end it really is not important to my happiness.

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